Hockey Pool Trash Talk

The long NHL season is finally over. For those of you who entered into a hockey pool in this 2012 season it's time to collect your winnings or, to pay up. In my case, it's about collecting all that hard earned money. Because, you see, I finished in first place. I won.

I destroyed the competition and humiliated my opponents.
We started this pool some six years ago. It was an offshoot of another pool that started two decades ago. Some of these guys I have known since my university days. Some I have only met in the last couple years. Whichever way you slice it, I beat their sorry asses. And now on to the trash talking.

Peter is one of the originals, we go way back some 20 something years. Peter finished in second place. He wins silver. He won the second place prize. So what does this mean? It means that Peter is the number one loser. Imagine if Andrei Markov had played half the season. You could have won. You have the foresight of an NHL G.M.. Too bad it's that of Pierre Gauthier.

Ralph is another old-timer who has been around since the beginning. Always the bridesmaid and never the bride, Ralph finishes in third place. He may have won before. I can't remember. It doesn't matter. You know why? Because I won this year. Every single one of those three points that P.A. Parenteau scored for you were hard earned points.

Dave was in first place. Once. A long time ago. On October 20th. Two weeks into the season. Your team was not bad this year. It just wasn't good enough to win any money.

Rob? Serious? A rookie as your first overall pick? This isn't 1984. Super Mario is long gone. Red Wings in final round? Excellent choice.

Ian, perhaps the burden of marriage and children have effected your winning ways. Or not. But that was some good food on draft night. For every lousy Chris Pronger and Matt Duchene pick, you did take Philadelphia in the final round.

I will take it easy on Shaun. Even though he spells his name wrong. This was his first year in a hockey draft. This man knows hockey. All it takes is for you to do your homework and prepare. That way, next year, after every second pick you won't hear each of us ask "Who?' or, "Isn't he playing in the Swedish Elite League this year?"

Ric, Ric, Ric. The season started on October 6th. You were in first place on October 7th. You dropped out of contention on October 8th. Injuries decimated your team. We will still let you back next year.

Now where's my money? I have to start preparing for the 2013 NHL hockey season. 

Hockey Pool Final Standings

No comments:

Post a Comment