Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Letters to Santa - Speedy Delivery Service


Christmas is coming, Christmas is coming! It's time to write your letter to Santa. With just a short time until the winter wonderland is upon us I have contacted the North Pole and set up a direct link to Santa's elves. Simply fill out the comment section and your Christmas wish list will be forwarded to Santa Claus. I guarantee swift and speedy delivery of all your letters to Santa. Just start it off with a Dear Santa and leave the rest to me.
I have conducted some research and pooled my resources with good old Saint Nick, this is the fastest way of getting your letters to Santa Claus. No mail strike will stop this delivery. So with a Ho Ho Ho, with Sleigh Bells Ringing, I'll be home for Christmas. And don't tell anyone if you saw mommy kissing Santa Claus. Whether this is your first noel, or if you are taking a sleigh ride with jingle bells, this Christmas make sure you spend the Twelve Days of Christmas in Toyland.

Tell your kids, or send a letter yourself. You know Santa Claus is coming to town, he's making a list and (from what I hear) checking it twice, fill out the comment form below, and you should get something nice.
From left to right, Frosty, Santa

17 comments:

  1. Brilliant!
    Dear Santa,
    Please send me a flat screen TV. I'm not picky but please make it a 52'. Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  2. HA!

    Dear Santa,
    Please send the Fender Stratocaster of my 14 year old son's dreams and an iPad. Thanks in advance!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dear Santa,

    I've been growing a beard to be more like you, but it's only alienated me from my friends and colleagues. I was hoping that growing a beard would get me more chicks.

    What's your secret?

    Thanks

    ReplyDelete
  4. Um, Mike, I can't guarantee that Santa will reply to your questions here. While I have set up a rapid delivery system for holiday gift lists (and he will get them) it is Sandy Claws' busy time of the year.

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  5. Dear Mike,
    Have you tried wearing a suit and a hat?
    -Santa

    ps thanks for setting this up Ohara. I spoke to Hanukkah Harry and if this venture is successful, he will want in for next year.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thanks for the comment on my blog about Michael. I like your blog and am glad to find it. Did you find me through my blog buddy Meleah? I see her here :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hi Barbara, thanks for coming by for a visit. I think I found you through Meleah but I can't promise you.

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  8. Santa,
    Cash. Plenty of it.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Dear Santa,

    All I want for Christmas is 18% body fat. I know you're busy, so I am willing to wait until January 31, 2011.

    Thank you in advance.

    Love,

    Cardiogirl

    p.s. That love will turn to hate if I'm still at 19% on February 1, 2011. Just so you know.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Cardiogirl,
    Santa suggests, reduce you dairy, alcohol and caffeine intake. Follow your warm up with a fast 30 minute run and 20 minutes skipping rope. This should be followed by fifteen minutes of shadow boxing, three rounds of sparring, and twenty minutes on the heavy bag. You can add the speed bag to your regimen, alternating it with the heavy bag each day. Your off days should start with a minimum 20 minute run.

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  11. Could you please let Santa know that after 30 years of running on and off my knees are shot and I am only able to walk, at a fast clip, on the treadmill?

    I also had a vein stripped two months ago to get rid of the gnarled varicose veins in my calf and was told my the doctor that my running days are over.

    I can, and do, dominate the elliptical machine, the stationary bike and free weights, however and I am looking forward to alternating between the heavy bag and the speed bag.

    Now if Santa cannot figure out a workaround for the treadmill I will lose all faith in him.

    Can you please forward that message? Thank you in advance and have a joyous holiday season.

    ReplyDelete
  12. CG,
    Sorry for the late reply, SC is busy these days and wanted to consult his coach.
    To replace running - and if permitted by your physician - focus on inline skating, the demand on the knees is much less than running. An alternative is swimming. As the water supports the swimmer's body, swimming is a the perfect exercise for those with joint or impact injuries.

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  13. gimme a weeks worth of sleep

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  14. If I post my online dating profile here, will Santa screen the men who put NA for education and who list camping, fishing, motorcycles or workng out as their interests? Oh and also the ones who are trying to look like him...

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  15. Dear dance2thebeat,
    I really liked your profile. Let me tell you a little about myself. I am 5'11. I am known for my hearty laugh and generous nature. I have a beard but look young for my age. I have a small farm and a factory, I raise caribou and manufacture toys. I like to dress in red. I am originally from Trinidad but I moved north.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Dear Santa,
    I need more vacation days. And a Let's Rock Elmo for my kid.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Dar Santa Claus, I want a Tickle Me Elmo and a Teddy Ruxpin. Oh, wait, wrong year.
    How about some Scotch?

    ReplyDelete