Toilet Plunge

My company went on the offensive recently. In an effort to stem the mess, signs were posted everywhere in the restroom – do your share to keep the bathrooms clean. Immediate effect. No garbage on the floor, toilets are getting flushed. And the guy who keeps crapping on the toilet seat? He only missed by a little today.

Anyone who is a guy, lives with a guy or knows a guy knows, that when you stand to urinate you can miss. How the heck does someone miss when they are sitting? I will spare you the explicit details to what I witnessed. Except to say the guy was sitting. And he missed. And it was not the first time. Believe me when I say, I want to catch the person in the act, without actually catching the person during the act.

On the topic of bathrooms, I know no one likes a cold toilet seat. It is preferable and much more comfortable when the seat is warm. When the natural warmth of the room warms the throne... you sit and ahhh...
You know what I hate more than a cold toilet seat? When the seat is still warm from the last guy. There is always that little bit of lingering something in the air that sort of just hovers above the bowl.

Can a company force an employee to wash their hands? This came up in conversation this last week. This was not discussed in any official capacity but merely as an aside. I thought the hysteria over H1N1 last year would have scared people into using a little soap and water. From my understanding walking out of the bathroom without washing hands is not just a guy thing. I suppose it is possible that you might not always need to use your hands. But come on, after sitting and wiping? Come on. Come on! Wash you hands!


  1. Ah yes,I think I know THAT GUY who always MISSES! Warm toilet seats rock, I think they should come in models like heated-car-seats. And seriously, people should REALLY wash their hands! YIKES!

  2. It's probably the same guy that works that Jersey- Quebec corridor, driving up and down the 87 and 15 messing with our toilet seats.

  3. Dirty toilet seats and unflushed toilets give me nightmares.

  4. Not to mention the awkward flushing of the toilet with your foot...